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Looking for My Loved One: the Top 3 Questions on Your Mind

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The top three things on your mind when you’re looking for someone you haven’t seen in years.

Thanks to Facebook and locator services, people all over the world are reunited with their long lost daughters, sons, sisters, moms, brothers, fathers and friends. It got me to thinking about what must be going through the minds of these family members as they are going through this heart wrenching process.

Here are the top three thoughts that are probably on your mind if you are looking for family or friends.

What Do They Look Like?

When you haven’t seen someone for a long while, or at all since birth in the case of a mother who gave her child away at birth, the top question on your mind will most likely be “What will they look like??” Will they be tall? Short? Brunette or blonde? Will they be in shape or will they be severely overweight?

But truth be told, it doesn’t really matter how they look when you are finally reunited with someone who you haven’t seen for years, decades or more. You are just happy to have them back in your life.

What Have They Been Doing with Their Life?

We all pray that our long lost family and friends are doing well for themselves. If you found out that they weren’t doing so well, you might start to blame yourself for that, even if your absence in their lives had absolutely nothing to do with their current circumstances. But regardless, we want to know how they’re doing, and if possible how we can help.

Will They Like Me?

The final question that is high on the minds of a person who is looking for a long lost family member or friends is “Will they like me?” Will I get along with this person who I haven’t seen for ten years (or have never seen in some cases).

I imagine that not every reunion turns out to be a match made in heaven. For example, some brothers and sisters are like oil and water — they just don’t go together. Some mothers may turn out to be the “judgmental” type and annoy the heck out of their newly found children. There is really nothing you can do to make someone get along with you. The tone of any relationship is usually established within the first few meetings.

If you are looking for family members and friends, or on the cusp of meeting a long lost family member, or even just fantasizing about what it would be like to see them again, try not drive yourself crazy with hypotheticals and don’t be disappointed if they don’t live up to your initial expectations. It takes time to get to know someone new — even if they are related to you.

Blessings to you in your search!

Posted by Jade

Tips for How to Groom a Cat

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Cats pretty much groom themselves, but there are some ways that you can help your kitty get clean if needed.

Wash Him

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Kitty in the tub. (Photo credit: joaorapaz)

The first step to groom a cat, especially if he is new, is to give him a bath. There is much debate over whether cats ever need baths at all. In my opinion, they need baths once in a blue moon. Bring him into the bathroom and lock the door. Your cat will probably start to look at you out of the corner of his eyes at this point, so you’ve got to act quickly. Put a bottle of cat shampoo on the tub and turn on the water. Put kitty in the tub and slowly wet him with your shower nozzle. If he doesn’t like it, just put a little bowl of water next to him in the tub and cup water over him. Soap him up, rinse him off, and then wrap him up in a snuggly warm towel (they love this part).

Luckily, cat’s don’t need baths as often as dogs do, because they self-groom, but from time to time for whatever reason your cat may start to smell a little too much like the litter box. So in this case, before you continue to groom your cat, wash him up.

Comb Him

There are several cat combs on the market that are perfect for grooming your cat, like the FURminator comb (very good for getting out excess hair). Grab a plastic bag to hold the hair that you will pull from his coat. Pull the comb with the grain of your cat’s coat. Cat’s don’t always like it when you go against the grain, because the comb pulls at the hairs too roughly. Spend at least five to ten minutes grooming your cat with the comb, pulling out the clumps of hair. Then use your fingers to pull off the excess strands.

Brush Him to Help Make His Coat Shiny

Once you finish combing your cat, go over him a few times with a cat brush. This will help to smooth his coat to a beautiful shine. Use a soft bristled brush for cats for this purpose.

Sometimes when you groom a cat, you’ll notice that he has matted down hair. In this case, buy a hard bristled cat brush and use it to before the cat comb.

Posted by Jade

Little-Known Facts About Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr

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Here are some facts about Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. that aren’t widely known by the general public.

He was a Republican

Most people would assume that because Dr. King was black, and fought for the rights of the underprivileged, that he would naturally be a Democrat. But the truth is that by many accounts, Dr. King was a Republican, and more conservative in his views.

It is also little known that in the past, most southern blacks were Republicans due to the fact that Democrats were well known for their racist ideals. They were guilty of championing three ideals that were, and still are, looked down upon by blacks and northerners — slavery, secession, and segregation. Only recently has the Democratic party come to be known as a party that blacks and the underprivileged support. So knowing this, it is not very surprising that Dr. King would decide to associate himself with the Republican party during his lifetime.

According to Earl Ofari Hutchinson, the author of The Emerging Black GOP Majority, some Republicans believe that Dr. King was aligned with them on many issues such as affirmative action and welfare due to certain comments he made in speeches. For example, they say that his quote stating that American’s should not be judged based on the color of their skin meant that he opposed affirmative action. Others believe that this idea is a little far-fetched.

Dedicated Fraternity Man

According to the history of the www.17th-house.com website, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was initiated into the Sigma chapter of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc. as the number 5 of his line in Spring of ’52. The Sigma chapter (Boston citywide) and the Eta Lambda chapter (Atlanta, GA) of his fraternity are dedicated to keeping King’s memory alive with memorials, presentations, and events. Eta Lambda says on their website that in 1956, Dr. King gave the keynote address at the fraternity’s 50th Anniversary Banquet in Buffalo, NY.

Only Man with U.S. Federal Holiday

As of this date, Dr. King is the only American (excluding U.S. Presidents) to be honored with a Federal holiday. Even the presidents of the U.S. have to share a day (President’s Day), but King has a day all to himself.

The national observance of MLK Day is a controversial issue for some who still believe that no man other than a president is deserving of that honor. Others are thankful that Dr. King is being recognized for his super-human efforts in helping to bring about justice for the oppressed people of the United States.

Bending Right Before His Death

As stated in accounts by Rev. Jesse Jackson, who was with Dr. King on the balcony where he was killed, Dr. King leaned over right at the moment that the gunman fired. Jackson has said that if he hadn’t been leaning down, he would not have been fatally shot in the neck.

“He had just bent over. I reckon if he had been standing up he would not have been hit in the face,” Reverend Jackson is reported to have said, according to the BBC News website.

Earl Ofari Hutchinson, “The Hutchinson Report: Martin Luther King a Republican? Not as Far-Fetched an Idea as You Think,” BlackAmericaWeb.com

1968: Martin Luther King shot dead, BBC News

Posted by Jade

Valentine’s Day Tip “Not Just Once A Year”

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Here’s a valuable Valentine’s Day tip that you can carry with you all year long.

Many of us wait for Valentine’s Day, to express our love and gratitude to our mates. I believe that the special attention that is paid to a mate on that day should be an everyday occurrence for the life of the relationship +/or marriage.

1043941_26514482My mate and I are fortunate enough to have actually been experiencing the added love that is generated on February 14th of every year on a daily basis, for over 19 years. From the day we met, all those years ago, we felt a connection that neither of us experienced in prior relationships. We felt mutually that we have experienced life together in a different era.

We honestly feel we are soul mates. Having that emotional connection helps us to appreciate the fact that we found each other again while living this life. That is why we feel that many couples are making a mistake by following society’s mores on when and how to show love and appreciation. For example, does a mate really need cupid’s day to arrive to have a date, buy them a gift or to make a romantic gesture? We say no you don’t!!! We firmly believe that couples in a successful and committed relationship show and give love on a daily basis with words and actions. It begins in the morning with both mates awakening and saying “I love you” and ends at night with those same words of affection.

As far as giving or receiving gifts, we give one another gifts everyday. Our gifts sometimes consists of making a hot cup of coffee every morning, just the way I like it. Or while my mate is preparing for work, I prepare and pack lunch with something special in the bag every time. To us, it shows that we are a team and shows love in actions other than purchasing expensive gifts.

Life is made so much more pleasant when in love. We are thankful everyday to “Mother Nature” for bringing us back together. So we say to all who have the great fortune of being in a loving and committed relationship to show that love everyday, not just on February 14th of every year.

Happy Valentine’s Day all year long!

Posted by Eve

How to Enjoy a Romantic Valentine’s Day At Home

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Tips for celebrating Valentine’s Day at home

Growing up, my mother always said, ” Your home should always be your oyster. ” I never understood that phrase and its full meaning until I was an adult.

Now, my home is my oyster and I take full advantage of it. In the past, me and my love would spend Valentine’s Day at a upscale restaurant or at a luxurious hotel, complete with room service. When we calculated how much money we spent over the years, we were astonished. It added up to be thousands of dollars. That money could have been better spent making home improvements or investing in our businesses.

With Valentine’s Day soon approaching, we are choosing to exchange gifts from the heart and have a romantic evening at home. Here are some of my ideas for having a great Valentines Day at home.

1. Make a dinner that consists of your partner’s favorite snacks, food and drink. For example, my spouse is an avid pizza eater and enjoys a ton of added toppings. So last year, when I called to order the pizza, I asked if they could make the pizza into a heart shape. To my surprise they did! My spouse was so appreciative of that simple gesture.

2. Next tip: adjust the ambiance in a room in your house. This could be the bedroom, living room, dining room or even the back yard (weather permitting). All that is required is to dim the lights and play nice easy listening music, whilst enjoying a meal, drinks and/ or appetizers.

3. If you happen to live in a warm weather climate, transform your yard into a Valentine’s Day oasis. You can do this by covering the patio table with a red table cloth and add candles and flowers. Also, you can string some outdoor lights to shrubbery, poles and awnings for an added effect.

4. Last tip: run a romantic bubble bath with rose petals added to the water, surrounded by lit candles and champagne for both of you to enjoy.

These tips for celebrating Valentine’s Day at home have yet to fail me. My spouse actually looks forward to them every year.

 

Tips for a Special Valentine’s Day on a Budget

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Many Americans are living on such a tight budget that spending $100-$300 or more on Valentine’s Day is just not feasible.

My spouse and I were affected, like many Americans by the economic downfall. So for the past 6 years my love and I have agreed that Valentine’s Day is not a day to spend our hard earned money on an expensive dinner, flowers, chocolates and gifts. We instead came up with an alternative method to spend quality time together and not break the bank. Here are three tips for a special Valentine’s Day on a budget.

Free Events

One thing that we do for a special Valentine’s Day on a budget is to separately research online any free events held in our local area that are happening before, on or after Valentines Day. For instance, last year my love (knowing that I enjoy wine) found a free wine tasting venue in our area.

Picnic in the Park

With just a little creativity you can have a memorable Valentine’s Day outdoors. For example, you can plan and have a picnic in the park on a nice sunny day. Bring hot chocolate in a thermos, homemade brownies and finger foods. You can then give your mate a heartfelt card, that is handwritten telling how much you love, adore and treasure their companionship.

In-Home Spa

Another idea for a special Valentine’s Day on a budget is to prepare a room in your house for a spa-like adventure complete with candles, massaging oils and relaxing music. Invest in a portable foot spa and a back massager for a real spa-like experience–a total of about $75.

In my opinion, spending a lot of money on Valentine’s Day does not show your spouse that you love them. Yet, when you carefully prepare, plan and execute a romantic gesture, shows your spouse that they are worth the time and energy it took to devise a plan.

Posted by Lorraine